Seppuku
by jeffs
Summary: Ranma prepares for Seppuku...


Seppuku (almost)  
  
Disclaimer: All the characters in this story belong to Takahashi Rumiko. I have no right to use them. This takes place before vol36.  
  
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Nermia General Hospital. Approx. 9:00 p.m..   
  
Nabiki stands outside the front entrance. Shampoo and Ukyo are running up to her. "How's Ranma?!!" they yell.   
  
"He's doing fine. They've pumped his stomach and got all the poison out."   
  
"Akane cooked tonight, like she promised at school, right." Ukyo smirks.   
  
"Nope. It seems her cookbook vanished today. And she has learned enough about cooking that she wasn't going to try a new recipe without the book, so Kasumi cooked." Nabiki smiles and thinks, 'I wonder how much my allowance will increase, I mean Daddy's not going to want Akane to know he caused the cookbook to vanish, now, is he?'   
  
"Shampoo's going inside to see Husband." Shampoo says as she starts to walk past Nabiki.   
  
"I wouldn't do that, just yet, Shampoo." Nabiki says. "You see everybody is so concerned about Ranma that they haven't started thinking about how Ranma got poisoned. I mean it wasn't Kasumi's cooking that caused it."   
  
"What do you mean, Nabiki?" Ukyo asks.   
  
"I seem to remember lunch today. I seem to remember how since Ranma was afraid that Akane would cook he asked both of you to fix him lunch. I seem to remember how the two of you showed up at the end of the lunch break. Both of you looked like you had been fighting. And I found this little bird that whispered about how the two of you were playing musical food. Adding and switching each others food while the other was doing the same thing to the other's food."   
  
Ukyo and Shampoo look at each other. Their faces pale. "You know, the doctors said that if it wasn't for his tremendous constitution Ranma would probably be dead. As it is, it took several hours for the poisons to work."   
  
"Her cooking was supposed to be bad! MINE was going to be the best!" Ukyo shouts pointing at Shampoo.   
  
"Spatulas' girl's cooking bad!" Shampoo shouts pointing at Ukyo. "Husband wants wife's cooking to be best."   
  
"You two fighting are not right now. The important thing is how much is it worth to you two, that attention is diverted away from you." Nabiki smiles her patented shark smile.   
  
They look each other.   
  
***** Inside the hospital. The Surgery Galley overlooking the emergency surgery room.   
  
Nodoka, Genma in Panda form, Soun, and Kasumi are talking to a doctor. "Your niece will be fine, Tendo Soun. She'll have to stay in the hospital for a couple of days, but everything will be fine." The doctor says to an uncrying Soun, while a sweat drop forms on Genma's head.   
  
'How am I going to kept Nodoka from finding out?! She's going to want to visit Ranma every day! Why didn't I grab the phone from Kasumi's hand when she said she was going to call everybody?! DAMN!!' Genma thinks.  
  
"However, the poisons have caused a very bad reaction with her appendix. Ranko will have to have it removed. now. They are going to be beginning the operation as soon as they put her to sleep."   
  
Nabiki, Shampoo and Ukyo come into the room. "I found out who poisoned Ranma. Kodachi slipped the poison into Ukyo's and Shampoo's lunch this afternoon." Nabiki smiles. "Right Ukyo? Right Shampoo?"   
  
They nod, gloomy expressions on their faces.   
  
**** The Surgery room.   
  
Ranma is in female form as she lies on the bed. Akane, in surgical clothes, is in the room as well.   
  
"NO! I ain't going to go to sleep!" Ranma yells as she pushes the anesthesia mask away. She then places her hands on her stomach and grimaces in pain.   
  
"Stop trying to be some goddamn macho, Ranko! If you don't let the anesthetist do his job, I"LL put you to sleep!" Akane yells at Ranma. In her right hand is an oxygen tank.   
  
"I ain't being macho, just to be macho, Akane. I got a reason!" Ranma yells back at her.   
  
"Tell me!" Akane lifts the tank.   
  
"Lean down. I do not want anybody else to hear." Akane leans down.   
  
Ranma purses her lips, grimaces, looks up at her mother in the gallery and starts to whisper to Akane. "One of these days, Pops stupid promises are going to cause me to commit Seppuku." She stops talking for a second. "When that happens, I want to make sure I can do it correctly."   
  
Akane stands up straight, looks up at Nodoka, looks at the tank in her hand. "You're sure, Ranma? No Anesthesia?"   
  
Ranma nods her head. "How else will I know, I can stand the pain of Seppuku?"   
  
Akane puts the tank down. She turns to the doctor and says, "Start."   
  
"Damn your father."   
  
When operation begins Ranma's hand slips out from under the sheet covering her. Akane grips it tightly.  
  
*****  
  
The inspiration for this came from reading: The Reluctant Admiral: Yamamoto and the Imperial Navy by Hiroyuki Agawa. There is a story in it that says that when Yamamoto was a young man he had appendicitis and requested the operation be done without anesthesia, for the same reason Ranma gave. Ate 42 oranges in one setting, on a bet.  
  
Thank you for reading.  
  
Jeff shelton 


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